Guardianship planning for parents: Simple steps to help protect your children’s future

A guardian is someone you designate who is legally appointed to care for your child if you die or otherwise become unable to provide care. Guardianship planning is simply a term to describe this process of choosing this person or people—and ensuring it’s documented and legally enforceable as part of your estate plan.

Having a guardianship plan in place can be immensely helpful for families during a difficult time. And it’s important to have one regardless of your family status.

Married parents often designate the same guardian and alternate choices via joint nomination in a will. If one spouse passes away, full rights default to the surviving spouse—guardians only step in if both parents pass away or are incapacitated.

Single parents should be aware of the other parent’s rights—if they’re alive and haven’t had their parental rights legally terminated, they’ll receive custody automatically. But it’s still important for single parents to designate a guardian in case the other parent also dies or is deemed unfit. One thing to consider is new relationships: stepparents or long-term partners don’t automatically become a legal guardian the way a surviving biological parent would.

Blended families should consider making guardianship planning a top priority, as the legal system won’t easily parse the lived reality of step-relationships. Having a guardianship plan in place can help ensure that a child remains in the blended-family environment they’re being raised in if a biological parent passes away.

Parents of dependents with special needs should consider designating a guardian who is not only capable of providing the care their child needs but also will consider the complexities of navigating lifelong care and maintaining eligibility for government programs like Social Security or Medicaid. 

Let’s look at a couple ways this kind of planning can help.

It helps ensure your wishes are known

A guardianship plan tells your surviving family and the court who you feel is best suited to care for your children if you can’t be there for them. You can make these plans in a low-pressure way now (as opposed to family members or the court being forced into it under stress) and leave behind a playbook for your family to follow, so they can focus on other matters.

This is the sort of planning that families may appreciate most—it removes doubt about what you might have wanted, it relieves stress during an already difficult time, and importantly, it leaves the power of decision-making about your kids where it belongs: with you.

It supports stability for your children

Perhaps an underrated reason to prioritize your guardianship plan is to help ensure as little disruption as possible to your child’s life. You can include in your guardianship plan everything from your child’s day-to-day routines to the relationships and values you’re raising them with that you want to preserve. This can help make the loss of a parent less stressful for children. With the right plan in place, they may lose you, but they won’t necessarily lose what you built for them.

If your wishes aren’t made clear and something unexpected happens, other people or entities will be left to make guardianship decisions. Let’s go over what might happen if you don’t choose a guardian.

The court may need to make the decision

If you pass away without naming a guardian, a court may have to step in to decide who will care for your children. This may result in your children being placed in the care of someone you wouldn’t have chosen yourself.

Loved ones could face unnecessary stress

Family members who wish to step in to care for your children may petition the court, which may result in both expensive and emotionally draining legal battles, during which your children may be placed into temporary foster care.

You can potentially spare your family members and loved ones these headaches by naming a guardian ahead of time.

The people you choose to fill in for you to raise your children if you become unable should be people you trust—but there are numerous factors you should consider when deciding.

Consider shared values and parenting style

Every family is unique, but finding alignment with a guardian on key issues may help you feel at ease with your decision. Here are some things to consider:

• Values: Does the person you intend to name as a guardian share your values? 
• Lifestyle: How closely does the lifestyle you live and create for your children now match the lifestyle of your potential guardian? 
• Parenting approach: Are you comfortable with the parenting style of your potential guardian? 
• Educational priorities: Does the person you intend to choose share your views on education for children?

Remember: It’s unlikely that you’ll find anybody who matches 100% with you on all factors. Finding someone you are generally aligned with, and who can provide loving care for your child, is more important than ticking every box.

Evaluate practical considerations

It’s also important to consider the practical realities of your guardian.

• Age and health: Consider both the capabilities of your proposed guardian and those of your children. Young kids may not be best suited for life with older relatives with health problems, for example. 
• Financial stability: Consider how well your designee will be able to absorb the financial costs of caring for a child. 
• Location: If your designee lives in another area, consider the effect this might have on your child. 
• Existing family responsibilities: Consider how your guardian’s existing roles as a parent or caretaker might affect their ability to provide care for your child.
• Ability and willingness to assume guardianship responsibilities: Talk to your proposed guardian about the role and responsibility before designating them. They should agree to the designation before you make it official in your estate plan. Also consider naming primary and secondary guardians, in case of a simultaneous tragedy.

It’s easy to presume that the best guardian for your children is their closest surviving relative, but that’s not necessarily the case. Be sure to consider all the aspects of what life will look like for both your child and the guardian as you make your plans.

Once you’ve identified your guardian(s) and they’ve agreed to the role, it’s time to make it official in your estate plan. Contact your attorney or estate planning professional to include your guardianship designations in the appropriate legal documents. These professionals will help ensure that the documentation complies with applicable state laws and is executed accordingly.

Organize important information

If your designated guardian needs to step in, you can help by preparing a simple, organized record of important information they may need to access right away. Putting together a packet or binder can help ensure your guardian has everything they need. Include items like:

• Emergency contacts 
• Medical information 
• School information 
• Key financial accounts 
• Insurance policies

Having this info handy can help to make a difficult situation easier.

Review your plan regularly

As a parent, you already know how quickly circumstances can change. It’s worth reviewing your guardianship plan once a year, during your year-end financial check in, and especially after major life events such as:

• The birth of another child 
• Divorce 
• Relocation 
• Death of a designated guardian

During your annual check-in, consider if your family circumstances—or those of your guardian—have changed and may impact their ability and willingness to step in as a guardian for your child.

If you’re still wondering if you need a guardianship plan, let’s consider these common myths and misconceptions.

"I'm too young to worry about this."

While you may be young and in good health, you simply never know what might happen. If you have children under age 18, consider a guardianship plan—no matter your age.

"I don't have enough money for estate planning."

A guardianship plan is separate from an inheritance. It’s about who would care for your children, not what assets you may or may not pass down to them.

"My family already knows what I'd want."

You may have had discussions with your family about your wishes. But without proper documentation, they may be difficult to execute. Don’t assume just because you’ve had a conversation that your planning is complete.

While you can’t predict the future, developing your guardianship plan can help give you some control if something unexpected happens to you. It’s a final act of care you can take for your loved ones, providing them with clarity for what comes next. Not to mention, with a guardianship plan in place, you can rest easy knowing that someone you trust is ready to step in.

Guardianship planning checklist for parents